It seems the Perry campaign is running out of steam. I know all of you are shocked at the news. In other news, Kim Kardashian filed for divorce. I guess I was somewhat surprised because I thought he'd make it to New Hampshire. At least his campaign is on life support unlike the Kardashian marriage.
According to recent polls, he is running fifth or sixth in Iowa. His campaign has decided to stop preparing for debates and to have the candidate skip them. Talk is cheap they say. Their candidate is tired of rehashing the same subjects over and over again. I suppose he wants to go back to the raw spontaneity of the stump speech. The national establishment and tea party movement are both shocked at the candidate's inability to hold his own in a debate format.
The revelation was similar to Kris Humphries when he expressed surprise when hearing that Kardashian had been married previously. If there were only a website, magazine, or reality television program that could have provided him with such information. With Perry, did they really buy into the excuses each time he avoided Bill White? I think he is still waiting for White's response to whether he exterminated the Smurfs.
Imagine what the national political audience will be missing. Let's begin with the calls from Ms. Perry about her husband being persecuted for his Christian beliefs. I wonder if Mitt Romney chuckled at the stark irony. He has been told he couldn't be president because he is a Latter Day Saint. If only there were more Evangelical Christians in the Republican party. Perry might have had a chance.
According to Ms. Perry, they are poking fun at her husband because a burning bush told him to run for president. I for one question any deity that would tell not one but two gentlemen with marginal intellectual ability to become the most powerful man in the world. However, I don't doubt the burning bush. We had the brush fires after all.
However, the all-time thing I will miss most was the suggestion that live debates should be replaced by a written debate. Candidates would be given questions and then two weeks to respond in essay form. I'm sure there wouldn't be any chance of those essays being ghost written. Is there a Flock Notes for sound fiscal policy or creative tax structures?
Could you imagine the greatest meetings of state from history being reduced to some kind of high minded junior high note passing game? Heck, why put the heads of state up at a Camp David or White House? Why stay at Versailles or any other castle? Rent a room at the Hampton Inn and make sure you reserve the conference center. Then again, if you want to use Wiki you could just secure a wi-fi connection.
Do these answers require footnotes or will a bibliography suffice? Do we grade on grammar, spelling, and punctuation? If one could run for president without having to think on the fly or possibly face any sort of hostility then maybe I could do it. It is a very Perry world after all.